Counting Down

I never really liked children. I told all my friends. That’s why, when I told them I was pregnant they weren’t thrilled. Plus, I lost my egg.

The eggs were an assignment for the inner-city girls group that my friend and I led after we graduated from college. Since teenage pregnancy was a problem in that area, we gave them the “egg assignment.” They were to carry a hard-boiled egg in a wire basket wherever they went for one whole week. No eggless nights, no eggless days. It represented a baby. Kind of.

But I lost mine, so I flunked egg 101.

Then, I got pregnant. So I had two strikes against me. Losing my egg and not liking children.

Shortly after I conceived, I was sick. And pregnant. And my face broke out.

But the baby grew in my stomach and in my heart. By the time I laid eyes on Sarah in the hospital, I was in love.

That was twenty-four years ago.

I can’t believe it.

And today, I’m packing for her wedding. It’s Sunday. In Tallahassee.

Where did the years go? I remember when she was four and playing with her friends across the street. They had a fight and Sarah came home crying. I hurt more than she did. Or later, when she and her dad and Micah built a tree house in our backyard. They’d be out there for hours hammering away.

Then there was middle-school. Enough said.

Then high school. My parents lived with us. Dad lost both legs to diabetes. I lost track of my little girl and the distance seemed insurmountable.

But God is a God of bridges. And we crossed that gap.

She met David and her face changed. She smiled a lot more.

I saw the pictures of her and David at a “Couples’ Shower.” In every one of them, Sarah was laughing.

It makes me smile.

It also makes me cry.

You know.

Think of us on Mother’s Day, will you?

And smile.


4 Comments on "Counting Down"

  1. Melissa F says:

    Sarah is a beautiful young woman. I wish we could be at the wedding!! Love ya!

  2. Sweet memories. Enjoy the day.

  3. Jennifer smith says:

    Glad she found true happiness!! Happy Mothers Day!

  4. becky says:

    This is so beautiful, Pauline – I totally know how you feel!! I love both of them so much!:) Can’t wait to see you!!

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