Faltering Faith

The song rang in my ears as my standard poodle, Sam and I walked the park:

“I am thine, O Lord, I have heard Thy voice, And it told Thy love to me;

But I long to rise in the arms of faith, And be closer drawn to Thee.

Draw me nearer, nearer, nearer blessed Lord,

To the cross where Thou hast died;

Draw me nearer, nearer, nearer, blessed Lord,

To Thy precious, bleeding side.”

 

Ever had a day where you wake up worrying, go to sleep fretting, and feel sick to your stomach? It’s been like that for me. Faltering Faith, I call it.

I know in my head that God is in control, but I don’t feel it in my heart.

I’m praying to be raised with those arms of faith, while I have my toes lowered for ballast.

I guess I think if I’m not in control of a situation, God can’t handle it.

I know that’s not true, so I cry out to Him while I walk.

“Lord. I’m weak. I want to trust You.” A jogger passes me and pauses as he sees my tears. “So, I’m gonna use Scripture back to You. Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief.”

And He does. As I purpose in my heart to obey and believe, the feelings come.

The funny thing about trust, is you have to trust before you can trust.

So, by His grace, I’m trusting. Just for today. That’s all He asks.

What about you? How do you trust God with your heart when you don’t feel it?

 

 

 

5 Comments on "Faltering Faith"

  1. Cheryl Koufas says:

    Wow, Pauline! You read my mind with this article. I recite Psalms 23. “The Lord is my Shepard….”
    It helps! At least it helps for me. Then I make a mental list of all the things God has done ( and sometimes has not done – LOL) I tell Satan to get behind me and GO AWAY! I ponder how to Love and trust God with all my heart. Like the love I have for my daughter or parents. Then I am reminded that God gave His son to die (a brutal death) for me. Could I do that?! Thanks for the thought provoking blogs!

  2. Sue Dunigan says:

    I joined your blog friend!!! You inspire and encourage me! Bless you… and boy did I need that word today!
    Simply trusting every day… trusting in the stormy way
    Even when my faith is small
    Trusting Jesus that is all!

  3. Pauline Hylton says:

    Thanks Cheryl and Sue. All of those suggestions are great! The Lord did help me. Go figure! I love that song, Sue. And Cheryl, I’m going to remember the 23rd Psalm is a “first defense.”

  4. Pauline, Thank you for your transperancy. You say so much in a short piece of writing. I can relate. I’ve discovered that during time of faltering faith as I ask God to help me trust Him, I grow in faith. It seems that after I fall, I get up stronger as long as I keep clinging to Him. I’m reminded of Proverbs 24:16 which says, “For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again…” Let’s just keep getting back up. God will help us.

  5. Pauline Hylton says:

    Thanks, Elaine. It’s a growth time, not something I would choose, but something I need. Thanks for the response!

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